Disclosure: The following events will not start until February, there is too much pressure with everyone watching in January.
I am going to start by saying I will neither get married or get divorced this year. And I definitely won't be doing both. This might not sound like a difficult thing to most of you, but for some of us, this seems to be an issue.
I am going to stop having imaginary conversations in the shower. Especially imaginary arguments.
I am going to start following the traffic laws and stop acting like everyone else on the road is an idiot except me, when I know damn well I am the problem.
I will stop watching Sister Wives. But if I do by accident, I will not cry. Unless a dog dies, then it would be OK.
I will become more environmentally friendly. I will stop using Styrofoam cups from the Loaf and Jug, even though a drink in a Styrofoam cup is pretty awesome. I'm taking one for the team here.
I will not lose weight. I
I will stop hitting snooze on the alarm clock a million times on work mornings. I hope this will prevent the issue I seem to have with getting my underwear on right side out when I am in a rush.
I will continue to try to convince my boss that I should work from home. I think I could be VERY productive in my pajamas and with bedhead and I would like the opportunity to prove it.
I am going to stop cussing. I really am going to do this. Really.
|This is the look I need to stop giving the boy when he speaks French.|
I am going to play the flute more. Just kidding, I have no idea how to play the flute. I could play the recorder though. That is a kick ass instrument.
I am going to stop spending endless hours scrolling mindlessly through Pinterest. It is stupid. I just sit there. For hours. Practically drooling on myself because my brain is so shut down. I have got to stop. Maybe set a time limit. I don't know.
I am going to stop using ..... as a replacement for a comma. And I am going to start using capitalization
I am going to stop fantasizing about Sam Champion and focus my attention on Josh Elliot in the morning while watching GMA. Since Sam got married last week, I have had to come to terms with the fact that Sam is gay and now married.
I will stop over using the word 'Wenis'. And I will not make wenis jokes. Don't confuse wenis with penis. I will still be making penis jokes. I would like to state for the record penis is not a cuss word.
I am going to decide what breed of dog I will get. If I decide to get a dog that is. Maybe I should decide if I am going to even get a dog first.
|This actually started out as a self portrait.|
I will no longer have a Tupperware cupboard that looks like a hurricane rolled through it. I will keep it tidy and organized.
I will stop using enie menie minie moe as a tool to make big life decisions.
But mostly, I am going to be sarcastic. That I know I can do.
HAPPY NEW YEAR YA'LL!